Answers served with a BOOM!
Kate Kearney searched: When is the third polar Popsicle party?
Approximately one week after the second polar Popsicle party (because everyone was so eager to do it again) and twelve months before the fourth polar Popsicle party (because… we might have had a little too much fun).
Kate Kearney searched: Which three places have your ideal yearly weather cycles?
There are three things I know about my relationship to the weather:
- I like everything about thunderstorms: the singing wind, the pouring rain, the way the sky cracks and lets something else in for just a moment.
- I like the look of snow, the sound of snow, and snow ball fights in parkas.
- If the temperature exceeds eighty-five degrees Fahrenheit with high humidity, and my time without air conditioning exceeds half an hour, I become one of Godzilla’s lesser known cousins.
So… I don’t know. Moscow? Anchorage? McMurdo Station?
Jessie T. searched: If you could take any character out of the last book you read and bring him/her into reality, which one would it be?
The last book I read was The Dream Thieves by Maggie Stiefvater. At first, I thought the answer to this question was going to be obvious – because I signed up for the Ronan Lynch fan club within minutes of him appearing on the page – but then I realized that if I had to deal with that boy in real life, there is a sixty-five percent chance that I would end up murdering him.
Then I thought it was going to be torture to choose between the dozen other amazing characters in the novel.
And then, quite suddenly, it was easy. There’s a certain criminal who has been running for a while, and could use a rest. He speaks some of the more uncommon dead languages. I wouldn’t mind listening and I know he wouldn’t mind finding a place where it was safe to speak. There’s never a problem with making a new friend who knows twelve ways to kill a man, is there?
Kate Kearney searched: Why is schedule tetris so hard?
Once upon a time, we began cutting the day into hours. Back then, we were very practical about it and divided the daylight into twelve even pieces and the nighttime into twelve even pieces. We didn’t care that a daylight hour might be shorter than a night hour, or that a summer daylight hour was definitely longer than a winter daylight hour, we just went with it.
We started putting lines in the day: sharp lines, distinct lines. We invented clocks and egg timers, which were brilliant for perfecting the hard-boiled egg, but terrible for things like midnight deadlines. We started sleeping from midnight to seven, showering from seven to seven-fifteen, eating breakfast until seven-forty-five, arriving to work no later than 8:30. Lunch at noon. Dinner at six. Meet JJ and Clark for a movie at seven-thirty-five.
And most of us never grasped that we can cut lines in the day, but not in our thoughts, and sometimes we’re not going to go to sleep right at midnight because we’re still thinking about that movie. And it will take us a little extra time get breakfast together, because we realized something in the shower (where all great revelations are made). And work thoughts do not always stay at the office, which can slow down dinner tremendously.
So while you’re schedule might say that you can fit that all into the neat little boxes of twenty-four hours, you’re wishing for larger chunks of time, for something other than little boxes.
Which leads us to the age-old adage: You never get a long one when you need it.
OhMyGiddyAunt44 searched: Have you listened to Hamilton?
I’m just like my country, I’m young, scrappy, and hungry!
Which is to say, yes. You have good timing, because I couldn’t have said that three days ago.
OhMyGiddyAunt44 searched: Do you sing along? Of course you sing along. How do you prioritize which parts to sing? I don’t have the breath to sing them all, or the overlap, or whatever. I can’t decide.
For me, it goes:
- George Washington (always prioritize the General)
- Alexander Hamilton
- Aaron Burr
And then, when Lafayette appears, I sigh and resign myself to not being able to rap in French.
OhMyGiddyAunt44 searched: Are you listening to Hamilton right now?
… Shut up.
(Hamilton just stole the British cannons. BOOM!)
Kate Kearney searched: What factors shape a person’s preferences?
This question is so broad, I feel like I’m trying to pin an elephant down by its ear.
I prefer purple to blue. Why? I don’t know. Probably because I remember my Dad’s favorite color being purple when I was growing up, and even though I question that memory as an adult, purple is still linked to dragons, and books, and Wolverine, and Daddy and those are all magnificent things. Let’s call that History, or Experience.
I prefer sushi to spaghetti and meatballs. Why? Ugh. If I’m being honest? Because it’s delicious and a little strange. Raw food is not common where I come from, and I like the idea of being uncommon, of not being boring. Let’s call that Socialization, or maybe Reputation. And let’s just go ahead and admit that we all take other people’s opinions into account, at least a little.
I prefer writing to painting. Why? Well, at this point, because I’ve practiced writing more. I’m better at writing. Putting the same effort into both, I reap better rewards in the writing. But once upon a time, before I’d practiced either? Let’s call that Choice.
I prefer stories about vampires to stories about werewolves. Why? Because I like chasing the definition of humanity, spelling out the transition to monstrosity and, to me, Blood-Drinkers bite deeper than Moon-Howlers. Why? I don’t have a clue. Let’s call that Personality, or Genetics, or Individuality, or just That Darn Wild Card.
Have a question for Gwendoogle? Leave it in comments below and I’ll be back next week to answer it.
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